I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
