What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize