He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
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He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
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Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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