I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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