I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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