it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
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