he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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