After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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