Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
