atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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