I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
