The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
