she was so not down for the gang bang
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
