This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize