I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
