I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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