You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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