Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize