I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
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