Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize