His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
The struggles of a small town man whore
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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