Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Randomize
