I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
