New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
