Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
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