420 ftw
where am i from again
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize