Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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