I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize