...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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