it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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