I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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