i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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