ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
