I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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