Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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