i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
