Cold hands, warm shart.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize