The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
