So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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