He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
