To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
it hurts more in the daytime
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
