only if we run a train.
done.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
