Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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