I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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