Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I have tasted many bathrooms
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
