Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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