I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Cover your peen. We're going out.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
