Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Randomize
