i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
