then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
