is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
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she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
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Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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