Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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