Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
